National

Ala-giri inaugurates School of English for Journalists

Tuesday, 02 March 2010 11:59
Written by maverick58, onionuttapam news
Print
Close on the heels of the scramble for online-dictionaries at 1am local time in Riyadh, the “breaking-news” afflicted visual media journalists were sent into a tizzy as news came out that the Kadavul of Southern India, Ala-giri had opened a school of English for Journalists, sending many including Rajbeep, #ArnabForPm and many anchors of leading news channels into a nail-biting panic. 


For his part, the hero if the day who has been made fun of for his non-English speaking skills in Parliament and Cabinet meetings, carried on with his usual Sunday Activity of Kattai Panchayats (the Tamilnadu equivalent of Khaap Panchayats of Haryana) He took time off from his lazy schedule and gave Mohini Kunwari an exclusive interview...

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Manmohan bitch-slapped

Sunday, 28 February 2010 13:38
Written by maverick58, onionuttapam news
Print
Post the euphoria of the Budget Presentation during which an irresponsible opposition succumbing to the doe-eyed charms of its leader staged a walk-out creating world history by shirking its collective responsibility as a democratic brake-tool to the government of the day’s runaway, unopposed proposals, Manmohan got down from his cavalcade at the portico of his official residence with a...

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Activists, protesters discover newer uses of SRK

Wednesday, 24 February 2010 12:39
Written by essbee, onionuttapam news
Print
This country just cannot get enough of SRK. As if using him for selling every damned product available on the shelves in superbazaars was not enough, he is now being used to sell even protests. Last year, the aspirational barber biradri of the country (which had begun to resent being called barbers ever since some hotshot barbers of movie stars started getting featured on television being...

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Govt demarcates Sachin's birthplace as 'Sachin Janmabhoomi'

Thursday, 25 February 2010 00:35
Written by essbee, onionuttapam news
Print
The government of India today demarcated the housing society where Lord Sachin Tendulkar was born on 23th April 1973 as 'Sachin Janmabhoomi'. The exact geographical location of his birthplace will be recorded using several media formats including high-resolution satellite pictures of his residence and stored in an underground nuclear bunker in a secret vault made up of an indestructible material...

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New Liberalization Policy: India To Open Up Asshole for Everyone to Fuck

Wednesday, 17 February 2010 15:54
Written by Sirka Pyaaz
Print
The Government today launched its new Liberalization Policy which will soon open up the country’s asshole for the entire world to fuck. This follows the opening up of the economy nearly 20 years ago. The policy was unveiled at a press conference earlier today with the theme of gaping, vulgar arse-holes. “Throughout history, Indians have loved the idea of getting ass-fucked. We wanted...

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