TN Special: Temple City gets a new deity or The Day Kadavul wet his diapers

It is official. After the birthday celebrations on 30/12/2010 of  *Kadavul aka Ala-giri, the word is out in the southern districts of Tamilnadu that Kadavul has become the presiding deity of the Temple City as Madurai is known to the tourists that come pouring in day in and day out. Little known to the junta of India until the last Parliamentary Elections, Ala-giri shot to fame when he delivered all the seats up for grabs barring one. The means to that end were questionable but why complain when your door is knocked, a polite enquiry as to the number of voters in the household and depending on the number, envelops containing crisp bank notes handed over. Any protests were snuffed by the removal randomly of an arm or a leg. After Ala-giri ‘won’ over his constituency he was aptly rewarded with the Chemicals and Fertilizers Ministry, a tongue in cheek reward by the amiable Sardar for having whitewashed the southern districts of Tamilnadu.

mk-azhagiri_in_madurai-lAs a reward for his elevation to the Union Cabinet he doled out plum postings in the Corporation of Madurai to his trusted cohorts and lackeys. The man who washed his pet, a dog, was rewarded with a Councilor’s seat going by the nick-name of Kutty and is one of the faithful who have carved up Madurai and rule over the territory with a zeal that would be the envy of Lord Alagar (his devotees offer coconuts, flowers and bananas ). Every deal that involves a bag of money is under the tight control of these faithful devotees of Ala-giri. The Sub-Registrars cannot affix and approve a deal involving sale of land without informing the devotee in charge of their ‘territory’. A ‘cut’ has to be paid else the deal is put off.

You want to open a new swanking mall that rivals the malls of Chennai? No sweat. Just pay a cut from your annual turnover as offering to the living Kadavul of Madurai. But then, frogs in the well get their come-uppance when they wander into the murky oceans of the world. Interested in the gory details? Here we go…

A jewelry retail chain opened up shop with much fan-fare and mouth-watering prices for their wares on offer. One fine day, Kadavul’s consort breezed into the shop and joyously picked up a few trinkets to adorn herself. She breezed out leaving the words that payment for the items would be done at her abode, to the stunned disbelief of the staff. Now, Jewelers are a lot that pride themselves about the high-flying customers and the service they are provided with; so, after a few days of waiting, the manager of the outlet ventured forth and peeled the bell of the abode of the Kadavul. Upon stating the purpose of his visit, he was literally hauled over the coals and a message sent asking for ransom or else…

The hitherto Joyous jeweler, having spread his wings within the country and in a few neighboring countries, was paying obeisance to a bigger Kadavul based outside India for an annual fee that included services like obtaining payments from lesser Kadavuls’ who stray into the path of the bigger ones. Lo! And behold the bigger Kadavul whose avatar goes by the name Woodda, picked up the sat-phone and called up the father of  Madurai’s Kadavul and set his terms. It transpired that Woodda had acted on his devoted devotee’s behalf and used lorries and cars to surround the Madurai *Kadavul’s son on a highway without the knowledge of the son. Fearing for the grandson’s life, the grandfather prevailed over the reigning Kadavul of Madurai to set the manager free with immediate effect and the manager walked back joyously to his shop. That was the day when a leading mall in Madurai offered it’s entire inventory of adult diapers to the presiding Kadavul. And that was the day that the Kadavul of Madurai humiliatingly learnt a lesson that he would never be the *Kadavul of Tamilnadu.

Moral of the story: Little frogs should stay in their well.

*Kadavul in Tamil means God.

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