Monsoon Flash by Met Dept
A relatively hassle-free start to the monsoon season in Mumbai has prompted the Meteorological Department of India to announce that monsoon this year has been a failure.
"All's quiet on the Mumbai front. No screaming headlines about Mumbai coming to a halt due to heavy rainfall. No hypercritical TV reporters bellowing their lungs out explaining to their viewers how BMC's lack of preparation has incapacitated the city. No sights of panicky Mumbaikars rushing home early to avoid being stranded at their offices." said Srinivas Natrajan, Deputy Director General at Mumbai Regional Meteorological center. 
After repeated failures, the Meteorological Department has given up predicting monsoon trends by analyzing data of cloud cover received from satellites. Nowadays, meteorologists at the department monitor the monsoons by watching 24/7 news channels. "Though south-west monsoons first hit the western ghats of Kerala, the pattern of monsoon in Mumbai has been providing us with truly substantial clues on the fate of monsoons every year for nearly a decade. Since the arrival of private round-the-clock news channels in India, we have noticed a sharp co-relation between the coverage on Mumbai rains on news channels and the overall extent of rainfall all over the country."
"This year has been unusually sedate. The lack of interest in Mumbai rains by news channels is rather ominous. Scanty coverage of havoc created by rains in Mumbai can only mean one thing - monsoons are not causing mayhem in Mumbai. I'm afraid this is bad news for the rest of the country. We could be staring at monsoon failure this year."
Sadly, the fears of the deputy director of Mumbai bureau have been validated by the new software installed at the department to study the co-relativity of Mumbai rains coverage and records of rainfall throughout the country. The software which monitors 57 different news channel in English, Hindi & Marathi to track all mentions of rains and Mumbai in news reports shows a sharp decline in coverage of Mumbai rainfall on news channels. The software predicts 35 percent less rains this year compared to last year. "Considering that rainfall last year was slightly below normal, a steep decline of 35 percent portends a failed monsoon." said Natrajan.
"No flights have been disrupted, unlike last saturday in Chennai and we are confident in our mid-monsoon period projection that the rainfall over the rest of the country would be way below average this time around", he added.
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