Onion Uttapam : India's Leading Satire Daily

Monday
Dec 01st
Text size
  • Increase font size
  • Default font size
  • Decrease font size

Alliance of Drunks

E-mail Print PDF
The party chief of DMDK, Vijayakanth, labelled as Drunkard by the Mother of Tamilnadu politics, Amma aka Jayalalitha for the simple reason he is eating away her voter base in the areas of Madurai and surrounding villages, told his party cadres at a recent meeting in Coimbatore that he was approached by both DMK and AIADMK for an electoral alliance in the forthcoming Lok Sabha elections. "Both the parties are willing to give 10 Lok Sabha seats to our party," he told the cheering cadres at a meeting of the party's new office-bearers in Coimbatore district. When asked for confirmation, Amma as usual threw us a curveball, "I dont like to see him drinking on-screen.What he does in the privacy of his home, like I and Sasi do, is not anyone's business. Isnt it? People watch films and get bad ideas. When I was a heroine, Our Revolutionary Leader, MGR, never allowed us to show our anatomy ata all, he made us wear thinly gauzed veils that were more alluring," she clarified with a flutter of her lashes. Continuing, she said, " And I made this offer because, I dont want him to join that evil man, Aiyo, I wont tell his name. You go, now!!"

vi21.jpgHowever, 'Captain' as Vijaykaanth is fondly known by his fans and partymen alike, shrugged off Amma's remarks, went for a for a voice vote instead at the meeting in Coimbatore to get a pulse of his cadres' mindset. "If we align with any of these parties, our chances of winning is 90 per cent. If we don't, the chances are just 70 per cent according to some opinion polls. What do you think?.

Karunanidhi, the Grandad of TN politics remarked, in a lighter vein, that, " The filmstar turned politician is welcome to join my party, if he continued with his drinking on screen just so that Jayalalitha, the starlet would concentrate on him and not me. After all, I too have been a part of the tinsel world and am writing a script for my next pot boiler. The hero in the movie is a good for nothing wastrel, but after his amma is put to death by a drunkard he wreaks revenge. Rest on the silverscreen. You can watch the trailer on the videosection of our spoof site, Onionuttapam.com."

In the meanwhile, DMDK chief, thundered, "Should we have an alliance or not?" The cadres most of whom were drunk with the visions of 70% shouted back, "We don't need an alliance. Let us go it alone." The DMDK chief retorted, "To make it alone, you all have to be united." This was in apparent reference to the drastic changes he had made in the Coimbatore party unit after factionalism erupted among the district office-bearers of the party, chiefly because most of them were under the influence of new found power. Power that involved appointing various party workers to plum positions or in obtaining and distributing First day First Show tickets for new releases. This habit was perfected much before the inception of the party in September 2005, and since the inception the DMDK has been doing fairly well in electoral terms. In May 2006 Tamil Nadu Assembly polls, DMDK secured 27.64 lakhs votes (8.3 per cent of the total votes polled). Mr Vijayakanth was elected to the Assembly from Vriddhachalam constituency. More than 400 DMDK cadres got elected to local bodies across the state in local body elections held in October 2006.DMDK continued with its good show in the bypolls for Madurai Central and Madurai West Assembly constituencies. The DMK's Ghouse Basha polled 51,240 votes, Rajan Chellappa of AIADMK 20,886 votes and M R Pannerselvam of DMDK 17,312 votes in the byelections for Madurai Central in October 2006. Out of the 1.75 lakh valid votes polled in the bypolls for Madurai west constituency in June 2007, K S K Rajendran (Congress) secured 60,933 votes while AIADMK's Selur Raju got 29,818 votes and the DMDK's Sivamuthukumaran got 21,272 votes.

Both the Dravidian parties, the DMK and AIADMK promised that if the actor-who-drinks-on-screen-turned-politician does not give up the super hero image or stops acquiring properties one would continue to call him a "drunkard" and the other, the ruling DMK has promised sleepless nights over his properties such as a 406-acre farm land in Madhuranthagam.
Quote this article on your site

To create link towards this article on your website,
copy and paste the text below in your page.




Preview :

Alliance of Drunks
Tuesday, 13 May 2008
The party chief of DMDK, Vijayakanth, labelled as Drunkard by the Mother of Tamilnadu politics, Amma aka Jayalalitha for the simple reason he is...

Powered by QuoteThis © 2008
Comments (3)add comment

maverick58 said:

DMDK leader Vijayakanth declaring in a speech at Namakkal that alliances were bound to change for the Lok Sabha elections has fuelled a fresh round of speculation that the actor-politician is moving closer to the DMK.The actor’s attack on the DMK and the Congress following the fuel hike did not have the usual punch.

“Petrol and diesel prices have been increasing for the last 20 years so we should try and use ethanol with petrol,” he suggested at the Namakkal meeting, which hinted that ‘Captain’ was softening his attack on the DMK government in an attempt to move closer to the DMK-Congress combine.DMK sources also indicated that a recently appointed top police officer, who belongs to the same community as Vijayakanth, has been entrusted with the task of weaning him towards the DMK front.

“The arrival of Vijayakanth would naturally mean the exit of Dr Ramadoss and his PMK from the DMK front, “theorised a DMK MP.The ‘Captain’ has also been reportedly assured of being compensated for the loss caused by the demolition of his marriage hall during a highway widening operation in Chennai.
 
report abuse
vote down
vote up
June 10, 2008
Votes: +0

poppy said:

smilies/cheesy.gifDont even think of coming back to Chennai. Amma will hoist a ganja case on you smilies/grin.gif
 
report abuse
vote down
vote up
May 14, 2008
Votes: +1

ragamuffin said:

Politics makes strange bed fellows. He can choose the lesser of the two evils !!
 
report abuse
vote down
vote up
May 13, 2008
Votes: +1

Write comment
quote
bold
italicize
underline
strike
url
image
quote
quote
smile
wink
laugh
grin
angry
sad
shocked
cool
tongue
kiss
cry
smaller | bigger

busy
 

OU Board Latest Posts

Re:Invisible Man To Become Reality Soon 2008/11/25 06:58 by maverick58
Re:Spy Gadget : A Ball 2008/11/25 06:56 by maverick58
Spy Gadget : A Ball 2008/11/25 05:10 by rubanshantakumar
Invisible Man To Become Reality Soon 2008/11/25 05:06 by rubanshantakumar
Re:Why do women cheat on their men ? 2008/11/24 07:20 by maverick58
Top 10 Mistakes on CVs and Resumes 2008/11/24 05:30 by rubanshantakumar
Why do women cheat on their men ? 2008/11/24 05:18 by rubanshantakumar
ab.png

In Video

9/11´s a lie
Views:268
Date:21-06-2008
Pink Floyd Dark Side of The Sheeple Compilation
Views:259
Date:16-06-2008
Hillary Clinton´s a nutcracker!
Views:210
Date:16-06-2008
CIA Sponsored Terrorism from 1953-Present
Views:351
Date:10-06-2008
A platform for enchancing creativity

Statistics

Members : 336
Content : 192
Web Links : 6
Content View Hits : 28936

Latest Comments

images/stories/demo/rangi64.gif
Faking News
arunphoto.jpg

Desi Radio


You are not logged in.